Claire's (long) Birth Story

I have a few posts that I'll probably post today, but I'll keep them in order, so I'll start with Claire's birth story. Tuesday morning around 3AM I woke up to go to the bathroom and was cramping a little. I shrugged it off to gas, but as I was walking to the bathroom I felt a trickle and felt like I had wet my pants. Again, I shrugged that off, because in class they tell you that you'll know when your water breaks, it will be a gush of fluid. I laid back down and the cramping continued. I was able to fall back asleep, but got up again around 6AM to continued cramping. I showered thinking I would go to work and see how things went. After losing some more fluid and my mucus plug I decided to call the doctor's office just in case. They wanted me to come in right away, since I was delivering in Iowa City which is a good hour away.

I finished getting ready and headed to the doctor's office. The doctor checked me and confirmed that my water had broken and I was 3 cm dilated. I was shocked. She said I needed to call Brad because we needed to get to Iowa City ASAP. They hooked me up for a quick non-stress test to see how often I was contracting, which wasn't very often, so I was able to ride to the hospital with Brad as opposed to going in an ambulance.

We got to the hospital around 11 and they started me on pitocin right away. I also had to have a penicillin IV because I had tested positive for Group B Strep. We had doctors/cardiologists coming in and asking questions because they needed to know what the plan was. We confirmed we were going the "comfort care" route and wanted to be able to hold her and spend as much time with her as possible.

I labored pretty easily from about 11 to 4 or so. I thought I was doing well breathing through the contractions and asked to be checked for progress again. The doctor said I was only about 4 cm. That was very discouraging. I was given some nubain to take a little of the edge off. It helped between contractions but did nothing to lessen the pain. It also made me pretty groggy. I believe around 6 or so I caved and got the epidural. I was all about going natural, but the pain was just too much and I knew I still had a ways to go. That helped tremendously. I still felt the contractions but was able to easily breathe through them and relax a little. Both of our parents came into the room so we sat and chatted with them for a while.

Finally around 10pm, I was checked and was 10 cm and ready to start pushing. Little did I know that the pushing would continue for 4 hours! Thank God for the epidural! We pushed with just the nurse (Emily - who was amazing) for about an hour and then decided to take a break and let Claire try to come down a little more on her own. The doctor came in and checked me again and felt that Claire was face up which was why the pushing wasn't progressing as quickly as we thought it would. I continued pushing and trying to get her to come out on my own. Finally around 1 or 1:30 the doctors came in again and asked if I wanted a little help since it had been almost 24 hours since my water broke. I of course said yes, so with the help of forceps, Claire was delivered face up at 2:06AM.

We knew immediately that she hadn't made it. Her face was very blue and she wasn't crying. They gave her to me right way and let Brad cut the cord. She was beautiful. She had a ton of black hair, her daddy's bushy eyebrows and long fingers and toes and her mommy's nose and lips.

Our parents came in and we all took turns holding her and taking pictures. The nurses gave her a bath and dressed her in a beautiful knit dress. We then had a chaplain come in and give Claire a blessing. It was perfect. We held her for a little longer and then decided to get some sleep. Claire got to stay in the room with us all night and all day the next day. We couldn't have asked for more.

We decided to go home Wednesday evening. A big storm was coming and we knew we would be able to rest easier at home. Saying bye to Claire and watching the nurse carry her out of our room was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life, and probably the hardest thing I ever will have to do. I can't even begin to describe the pain we felt knowing that we will never get to see or touch or hold her again. It's still painful, but I get through it knowing that this was God's plan and he knew all along that she would never have to suffer or feel any pain.

I have to finish this insanely long post by saying that the nurses and doctors at the hospital were absolutely wonderful. They listened to all of our requests and gave us hugs and told us how beautiful Claire was. They gave us so many things to remember Claire, I can't even begin to list them all. It was more than I ever could have imagined.